Servant of One Master
by FanFictionEngineer
Summary: Starts 4x06 (Servant of Two Masters): Morgana has Merlin captive in her hovel. Before she puts the Fomorroh on Merlin, he does something unexpected. See how their relationship grows. MERGANA!
1. Chapter 1 - Dreams

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, but Morgana owns my heart. . .**

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CHAPTER 1 - Dreams

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Morgana douses Merlin with a bucket of water and he jolts awake. He notices his hands are hanging from the ceiling with a rope tightly wound to his wrists.

Morgana greets Merlin with a sarcastic tone, "Good morning."

"Is it?" Merlin answers back in his sarcastic tone. It has become comfortable for Merlin to address Morgana with exactly how he feels for her. Unlike in Camelot, where he has to constantly follow the social rules of being a servant, he likes the freedom he has to be able to openly talk to Morgana any way he likes.

"Oh, don't be like that. We have a lot of catching up to do. After all, I haven't seen you since you condemned my sister to a slow and painful death, thwarted my plans to take over Camelot, and forced me to live in a hovel," she responds angrily.

"Could you do me a favor, could you? Let Arthur know, he still thinks of me as an underachiever, but I'm quite proud of those accomplishments," he answers proudly. "I can die happy." In Merlin's mind, he has accepted his fate. Now that Morgana has him defenseless, he is ready to accept her revenge on him. In a sense, he wants to atone for almost taking her life repeatedly by giving her the reigns to his life.

"Oh, you're not going to die. Oh, no. I'm not going to make it that easy."

Merlin's eyebrows furrow as he tries to figure out what Morgana just said. Surely if she is to torture him, he might consider trying to escape. He knows that he can easily overpower her by using his magic. But that would reveal himself to his mortal enemy. The damage she can do with that information can be catastrophic for Merlin. "_The only way this will work is if I kill her here_," he thought to himself somberly.

Merlin watches Morgana as she walks towards a bucket of water and picks up a washcloth. He examines her as she begins dousing the washcloth with water, and silently laughs at himself for ever thinking that he was attracted to this woman that is now confined to a lowly hovel. Nonetheless, even in her raggedy clothes, he still cannot help but to think how poised and ladylike she carries herself. "_Can I ever bring myself to kill this woman?_" he thought.

Morgana interrupts Merlin's thoughts, "You know, there's one thing I don't understand, Merlin," she says while proceeding to clean Merlin's wound. "You're Arthur's servant, nothing more. Yet, time and again, you've proved yourself willing to lay down your life for him."

Merlin looks questioningly at Morgana as she cleans his wound, "What are you doing?"

"Have you never seen Gaius clean a wound before," she answers maliciously.

"All right, I know what you're doing. What I don't know is why," he responds back. He notices how close Morgana is to him while she works on his wound. He looks at her hands working on his wound, and notices how much it's changed from a hand that exudes nobility to one that's of a servant. His eyes are then drawn to look at Morgana's, and he marvels at how green and enchanting they are. He remembers how often he would get distracted talking to Morgana because of how drawn he was to her eyes.

Morgana grabs his face suddenly and he is disrupted of his thoughts. "I believe I asked you a question first. Why are you so loyal to Arthur?" Morgana's face has gotten closer to Merlin, and he is distracted by her lips. He snaps himself out of his thoughts.

"I don't expect you to understand, Morgana. You have no sense of duty, no sense of loyalty," he answers. Merlin starts to feel uneasy as he senses Morgana's anger. He starts thinking if he should indeed use his magic to break free at that moment.

"You're wrong. Don't think I don't understand loyalty just because I've got no one left to be loyal to," she responds bitterly.

Merlin looks at her closely, only mere inches separate them. He still cannot stop thinking about how beautiful he thinks Morgana is, even in her current state. He tries to fight his thoughts because it sounds ridiculous to him. But the thoughts do not stop. He begins thinking of the past, the things he could've done, the things he could've told her. He remembers the countless hours he put in just to pick flowers for her. Going out deep into the forest to find the flowers that she likes most. Urging Gaius to create more sleeping potions for Morgana so he has an excuse to see her at night. He thinks to himself, "_I'm about to die or be tortured to death anyway, then what's the difference if she kills me now for acting on past emotions?"_

Without a second thought, Merlin closes his eyes and takes the plunge. He dissolves the inches of separation between his lips and Morgana's. Morgana accidentally drops the washcloth as Merlin's kiss surprises her. Eventhough Morgana has had a lot of suitors during her time as Uther's ward, she has never been kissed. She cannot believe that her first kiss would be with the man standing before him. It takes her a second to realize what is going on before she angrily breaks off the connection.

"What do you think you're doing?" she says furiously. "Why did you kiss me?" She is almost yelling.

Merlin stays silent and revels in the kiss. He is in his own world and doesn't notice Morgana screaming at him. He never thought that kissing her would make him feel this way. On one hand he feels that he successfully angered and confused his mortal enemy, and on the other, he feels happiness and contentment that he has fulfilled one of his dreams.

Morgana proceeds to place her hand over Merlin's wound as she incants a spell. Her eyes glow gold. She grabs Merlin's face again and shoves him as he falls unconscious.

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**This story has been on my mind a bit. When I saw this episode, I just heard myself screaming at Merlin "Kiss her, kiss her!" Did anyone else think they were physically too close? Clearly they needed to kiss. hehe**

**Look out for more updates. Note that I will update my other fic "Let Me be the One" first though. :P**


	2. Chapter 2 - Memories

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, but I am a Slytherin. . .**

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CHAPTER 2 - Memories

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Morgana sits idly on one of her chairs staring at Merlin's unconscious body. "_How dare this servant defile my lips with his? I should just kill him on the spot_," she thought to herself. "_Who does he think he is? He doesn't have the right to kiss me._"

Morgana continues with her thoughts and she finds her fingers unconsciously touch her lips. Her first reaction to Merlin's kiss has that been of anger, but she would be lying if she said she's never thought about it before.

She grew up being the center of attention in Camelot, the most beautiful lady in the court. She is used to the attention that she gets. Attention from princes, nobles, and knights. But there is something that intrigued her more with attracting the attention of this certain servant boy.

Merlin came into their lives quite suddenly and he quickly became a regular fixture in the Camelot castle. She noticed him, but not in any way romantic. It wasn't until she realized how good of a friend Merlin was that she started to notice the man trapped in a servant boy's body. She came to confide in him, and even trusted him with her deepest secrets. She felt comfortable with him. She even went as far as to convince Gwen to come with her to accompany Hunith and Merlin to Ealdor to lend a helping hand. She recounts that the reason she went to Ealdor was because of Merlin.

She remembers the time that Gwen teased her for the flowers that she kept receiving from Merlin when her dreams started to get worse. "I'm glad you're awake Morgana. You have more flowers again. Guess who they're from," Gwen said teasingly while trying to fight away a small grin.

"I suppose they're from Uther?" Morgana answered innocently.

"No Morgana, they're from your secret admirer. Merlin," Gwen responded now with a full smile.

"GWEN! Stop making that face," Morgana said, her cheeks blushing.

Morgana cherished the worry and care that Merlin had for her at that time. She always did place his flowers on extravagant vases and openly displayed them in her chambers. She's always known of Merlin's fondness towards her, she's even caught him a couple of times staring at her. But she liked how he looked at her. Unlike her other suitors that only looked at her in lust, Merlin's fondness was innocent and pure. She thought of how different kissing a lustful man would be to someone who has a genuine interest in her heart.

But now, everything has changed. Relationships are not the same, and frankly in her point of view, irreparable. Those memories are only but a blur to her and she gets irritated at herself for even stirring those thoughts. She blames the kiss for bringing back the memories. She is surprised at herself that Merlin's kiss has such an effect on her. Surely it is nothing, she thought to herself.

Her attention is diverted back to Merlin as he begins to awaken. She has moved him to a seat, but he is still bound tightly.

Merlin's eyes open to crystal green eyes staring at him, sitting on a chair across from him separated by a small table. He immediately notices that he is sitting on a chair with his hands tied behind the back of the chair. He doesn't remember when he was moved to the chair, but he does remember the kiss he shared with the woman staring back at him.

He admits to himself that he did like the kiss they shared. He would cherish one of the last good memories he has with Morgana, the woman that he has secretly pined for, for a long time.

He decides to be cheeky with her, because for some odd reason, he finds her attractive when she's angry. Also, he has accepted that she is going to kill him soon for what he's done anyway, so might as well have fun.

He breaks the silence first, "Good evening honey, would like me to set the table?"

Morgana's somber expression transforms to reveal her irritation. "_How can this fool talk to me so casually,_" she thought to herself angrily. She stands up and moves toward a metal bowl that seems to have a creature enclosed.

Morgana picks up the bowl and shows Merlin. Merlin's grin fades from his face.

"I take it you've never met a Fomorroh before?" The Fomorroh hisses and she giggles evilly.

"Aw, he's a little grumpy," she says as she begins to pet the Fomorroh. "He's not used to being out in the light. No, my friend, I've called you from your depths for a very good reason."

Morgana uses her dagger and slices off one of the Fomorroh's heads. The cut off head is still alive and another grows back on the mother beast. Merlin looks uneasy in his chair.

"Fomorroh are creatures of dark magic. Even if you cut off their heads, you cannot kill them. Another will just grow in its place."

Morgana continues, "In the days of the Old Religion, they were revered by the High Priestesses as they allowed them to control people's minds." Morgana approaches Merlin in his seat. "The Fomorroh will suck the life force out of you. Everything that makes you Merlin will be gone. And in its place there will be just one thought. One thought that will grow until it's consumed you completely. One thought that will be your life's work. You will not be able to rest until it's done. And that one thought is simple. 'You will serve only one master, me.'"

Morgana places the Fomorroh on Merlin's neck and it burrows into him. Once again, Merlin falls unconscious.

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**How do you like flirty Merlin? Bwahahaha.**

**Of course I gotta give props to his impeccable taste in flowers. **


	3. Chapter 3 - Revelation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, but I have been in a castle before. . .**

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CHAPTER 3 - Revelation

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Morgana is overlooking a scene after a battle. Dead bodies, shattered swords, and blood stained flags fill the scenery in front of her eyes. Panning the view, her eyes arrive at an old man's figure. She realizes that she is on the ground, helpless, and this man is looking down at her. She reaches to the man and calls to him by name, "Emrys, please . . . " she cries out to him.

The old man responds to her, "Is this really what you wanted Morgana?" Then the earth begins to shake, as if an earthquake hit. She starts hearing a different voice call her name, "_Morgana . . . my lady . . . wake up my lady . . . you're having a nightmare . . ._"

Morgana wakes up to Merlin's voice and he has shaken her to wake her up.

"My lady, you were having a nightmare," Merlin tells her worriedly. "I didn't mean to shake you, but you were crying in your sleep."

Morgana's eyes begin to focus and she recognizes the sunlight outside. It is very early in the morning. She looks at Merlin who is sitting on her bed and pushes him off. She remembers that she unbound him from his chair last night. She trusted that the Fomorroh will keep Merlin faithful to her as his master, so she felt perfectly safe having him free.

"Why are you up so early," Morgana asks, and still unable to fully wake. She is tired, physically, and emotionally, from the recent events that transpired. "Your wound is not yet completely healed, and the Fomorroh takes a toll on the body. It should take you days to be at full strength."

"I'm sorry my lady, I can go back to bed if you'd like," he answers as if robotically, but she could tell that there is a bit of sarcasm in his tone.

"Oh shut up," she responds as she props herself up to a sitting position in her bed. "And stop calling me my lady. You know my name."

"Yes, my la . . . my Morgana," he trips on his words. "I mean, just Morgana. Not _my_ Morgana. You are not mine. Just Morgana," he answers trying to hide his nervousness.

Morgana looks at him questioningly and raises one eyebrow in Gaius-like fashion. She actually finds it funny and imagines how else she can enjoy the use of the Fomorroh.

"_Just_ Morgana. I am awake early because I have washed your clothes, polished your dagger, and made you breakfast," Merlin states proudly in his serving tone.

Morgana tries to fight a smile as she is reminded of Merlin and Arthur's relationship. "It seems I am to start getting the Arthur treatment," she asks.

"Of course _Just_ Morgana. I have also taken the liberty to reorganize your cabinets and belongings," he answers. "It seems that you are a very messy person. I guess that is why Gwen was always very tired at the end of her day. She had to keep your room neat and tidy."

Morgana begins to look around her hovel and notices that everything has been rearranged. Her hovel has always felt small and crowded, but Merlin's reorganizing opened up the room to more space. She has stepped out of bed to have a look around and she recognizes that her potions, containers, belongings, and miscellaneous items have been neatly ordered in respective shelves.

She walks toward her dining table and sees that Merlin has set the table for eating. A solitary plate is positioned there with the vegetation and fruits that Merlin has brought in. It seems he really did want to "set up the table" as he joked last night. She is reminded of how he said it though, "_I can't believe this fool called me his 'honey.'_"

She turns to face Merlin who has stayed stationery where she left him, standing there proudly. She addresses him, "Did you eat already? Where is your plate," she asks trying to be as insincere as possible.

"I have not yet eaten. But it is much more important that you have your meal before me," he answers.

"Stop being so noble you skinny fool," she orders. "Come have a seat, I don't think I can eat all of this. How did you find so much anyway? Did you do some farming while I was asleep?"

"No I didn't, I just woke up very early," he answers. "It seems that I had a lot of sleep and rest yesterday." He smiles back and proceeds to walk towards the table.

Morgana agrees as she did knock Merlin unconscious several times yesterday. She studies Merlin, and realizes that her words have not been entirely accurate. Merlin is not the skinny boy that she remembered. It seems that being Arthur's punching bag has helped Merlin build more muscle and size.

Merlin moves to where Morgana has been standing and pulls the chair next to her. He motions for her to sit down and she obliges. He then proceeds to get himself a plate and places it on the table as he sits down on a chair across from Morgana. He sits upright, only his toes are touching the ground and he has his hands situated on his lap.

Morgana divides the food and gives most of it to Merlin, "You need to eat to regain your strength. The sooner you get better, the sooner you can return to Camelot."

"Return to Camelot? But Morgana, I'm only supposed to stay with you," Merlin responds, he seems heartbroken. "How can I serve you when I am away from you?"

She is taken aback by his response, but she attributes it to the Fomorroh's control over him. "When the time comes, I need you to go back to Camelot. I have a job for you to do."

"After that, I can come back to you Morgana?" Merlin asks innocently.

"Yes, you can come back after your task is done."

Merlin smiles joyfully and he begins to nibble on some vegetables.

Morgana begins to eat but she can't help herself from looking at Merlin occasionally. She likes having company and she does get lonely at times. She has been alone ever since Morgause passed away and Agravaine isn't really good company. Merlin's presence lightens up her once dark and lonely hovel. But she pushes her mind away from Merlin, she understands that the loyalty he shows is the result of the Fomorroh. She thinks that this will be short-lived and will have to dispose him eventually.

After the meal, she stands up and addresses Merlin, "I will go out and look for materials to make you a bed while you stay here. You'll need the best rest you can get to recover quickly."

Simultaneously, Merlin stands up as Morgana did. "No need Morgana, I can go and do that myself."

"Nonsense, you will stay here."

"I am your servant Morgana, at least let me accompany you."

"Fine, but don't slow me down. I have to pick some herbs as well." Morgana answers.

Both Morgana and Merlin walk out of the hovel, and Morgana leads the way deeper into the forest. It is normally in denser foliage that one can find good sleeping materials, as well as the rarer herbs that Morgana needs. They have been walking deeper in the forest for about an hour and Morgana spots one of the herbs she needs. She approaches it to pick while he commands Merlin, who has mostly stayed quiet during their walk, to go pick up a specific herb that she requires. She knows that Merlin will be useful for herb picking as he has done it regularly for Gaius.

Merlin separates from Morgana to follow her command. He hasn't gone too far when his magical intuition warns him of impending danger. He feels the presence of bandits, but these bandits do not feel normal; these bandits have magic, and strong magic at that. He scans the path ahead of him but he does not see them. He begins to worry for Morgana. He knows that she is fully capable of defending herself, but defending herself from possibly several magic users is not an easy task even for someone as skilled as her. He scans to where Morgana is, and sees her concentrating on herbs. She does not see the men that are closing in on her.

His feet take off to run towards her, but he is slowed down by his injuries. Moreover, the toll of the Fomorroh on his body has significantly reduced his strength and stamina, but he presses on to protect Morgana. He hears her scream right when he arrives on site. She has an arrow on her leg, and she has just been thrown towards a tree with magic.

Merlin counts about eight sorcerers and they all surround Morgana. She is still conscious, but she is severely weakened. She notices Merlin running towards her, and she tries to speak to him, possibly to warn him to run away. But Merlin does not care, he is there to serve his master, his only master.

Several of the sorcerers are already conjuring fireballs, and the others have crossbows directed at her.

It is almost the end for her. She knows that it is only by magic that she can be killed, and here she is, sitting helpless against a tree. She is almost losing consciousness, but she is still trying to warn Merlin to leave. Merlin is getting close to where she is now, and she is thinking to herself how stupid and foolish this boy is. "_What is this fool going to do, jump in front of their attack and hope that he could talk his way out of it?_" But she begins to admire him for being courageous and silently thanks him.

The fireballs leave the sorcerers hands and they are heading directly at Morgana. The rest of the attackers release their crossbows as well. With several more steps, Merlin is finally at her side and she marvels at his confidence. Her strength is waning, and her eyes begin to close. She decides to focus on Merlin as she looks at his deep blue crystal eyes. She wants the last vision she has on earth to be of Merlin's face. She sees protectiveness in him as he lets his anger overflow from his whole body.

Suddenly, she notices his eyes shine gold. With a wave of his right hand, an invisible barrier appears that absorbs all the attacks. He then raises his left hand and it conjures a small tornado that he directs towards their attackers. In mere seconds, he easily defended all the attacks and managed to kill every one of their attackers. She has never seen magic of this power from any sorcerer.

She sees Merlin run towards her but her eyes finally close as she drifts into unconsciousness. However, before falling unconscious, she comes to a revelation, "_Merlin has magic_."

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**I always wanted Morgana to find out about Merlin's magic when he goes into beast mode.**** :D  
**


	4. Chapter 4 - Damage

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, but I do own Katie McGrath's "A Princess for Christmas" DVD . . .**

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CHAPTER 4 - Damage

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It is late in the evening, and she feels pain in her left leg. It also seems that her whole body is sore. She feels herself being in her bed at the moment, and wonders how she got there. She remembers now, she was shot with an arrow and attacked by rogue sorcerers. She was close to death, a mere few seconds left before she left the world. But something happened, the memory of the events flood her mind. She was saved, and this person was someone with magic.

She quickly opens her eyes, and sitting a few inches away from her bed is Merlin. He is looking down on her worriedly, and it appears that he has been sitting there for quite some time. His eyes open wide to look at her and smiles to see Morgana awaken.

Morgana begins to remember more about those moments. The person that saved her begins to take shape in her memory, and it resembles Merlin. Now that she thinks of it, it is Merlin.

"You have magic Merlin," she lets out as if a statement of fact, but her countenance exposes some doubt. "How long have you had mag . . . ahh!"

She feels a sharp pain in her left leg as she tries to sit herself up. Merlin quickly shifts forward from his chair to catch her, "Morgana, you have to lie down."

"No! I want to sit up. I need to talk to you."

Merlin obliges and aids her to sit up from her bed. Morgana winces at the pain, but manages to sit up.

"So . . . magic?"

"Yes Morgana, I have magic. I . . ."

"How long have you had magic," Morgana interrupts angrily.

Merlin takes a few moments to respond; he knows that she will not like the answer, "Ever since my childhood."

"So you knew all this time? You've had magic in Ealdor," she states.

"Yes Morgana."

"And when you arrived in Camelot?"

"Yes Morgana," he responds with a deep sigh.

"You had magic when we met?"

"Yes Morgana."

"Did you ever lose your magic?"

" . . . Morgana?" he is now confused.

"Merlin, when we met and became friends. Did you, at any point, lose your magic? A point in time where you could say that you do not have magic? Or even forgot about it?" she questions menacingly.

"No Morgana . . . I've always had magic," he answers and starts to understand where Morgana is heading with her thoughts.

"So, when I came to you that night, and told you about my dreams, about what was happening to me, you knew what magic was?"

". . . yes."

Even before Merlin can explain himself, Morgana's eyes shine gold and Merlin is sent flying into one of her standing bookcases. Morgana acted on impulse, and her anger drove her to lash out on Merlin.

Merlin is still conscious, but he has severe cuts and bruises from the shattered glass containers and the solid wood bookcase. He struggles to get up from on top of the bookcase that now lies on the floor. Neither anger or surprise is on his face, only guilt is visible. He looks up and his eyes meet Morgana. Sadness fills his heart as he can see her face resemble the same look she gave him when he poisoned her.

He is now up and he tries to talk to her, " . . . Morgana, I am so . . ." _Wooosh_.

He flies off again, now he hits himself against the wall, and his body slides down onto the floor against the wall.

"Don't talk Merlin, I don't want to hear it," she yells. "It is as if you have poisoned me twice."

". . . I'm sorry Morgana," he answers somberly and cuts himself off from talking to follow her command.

He stands up again and is now on his feet. He is bloody, bruised, and noticeably limping. He feels Morgana's stare on him as he moves to the damaged bookcase. He begins to pick up shards of glass and puts them in a container.

"What do you think you're doing?" Morgana asks angrily.

"I'm cleaning your hovel Morgana," he answers without looking up. "You are still injured and I couldn't risk you hurting yourself from the mess I made."

Morgana's anger turns to tears. The anger she has subsides as she is taken aback from Merlin's display of devotion. How she wishes that she had someone like Merlin caring for her when she needed someone. At the time that she discovered her magic, she was grateful that Merlin took genuine interest in helping her. She thought that Merlin was a true friend for trying to help her with understanding magic even if he didn't have a reason to put his life in danger, especially for something that he has no idea about. But now she knows, he acted like he cared because he had magic. "_Why didn't he just help me himself? Why couldn't he confide in me?_"

"_Why did it have to take a Fomorroh to have him care about me?_"

Watching Merlin clean has made her annoyed. She directs her words at Merlin, who is carefully cleaning shattered glass, "Why are you doing it by hand, why don't you just use magic," she asks, but there is still anger in her voice.

"Because using my hands make it personal," he answers as he turns to look at Morgana. "I want you to see how sorry I am and how genuine I am in my care for you."

Morgana sheds more tears as she watches Merlin pick piece by piece by hand. His lack of trust in her in the past about his magic hurt her more than she can imagine.

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The council convenes and one statement lingers from everyone's minds. "There is a traitor in our midst."

Only Gaius knows who the traitor is, and was almost ready to reveal Agravaine to the council. But he is unlike Merlin, who would act without fully planning things through. So he bides his time and decides on silence.

He is interrupted from his thinking as he arrives outside the great hall. Arthur pulls him aside to speak.

"Gaius, you are one of Camelot's most trustworthy citizens. Do you have any thoughts on the traitor?" Arthur asks him.

"My Lord, I think it wise to conduct some investigations first before planting an idea of a suspect," he answers. "Doing so will help avoid false leads."

"You are right Gaius, I will look into it first," Arthur agrees.

"Also, My Lord, in your investigations, don't forget to look at all the facts, no matter how close they may be to you," Gaius adds.

"Of course Gaius," Arthur answers as he notices Gaius' worry. He knows that the traitor is not what really worries Gaius the most. He decides to reassure him.

"Don't worry Gaius, we are doing everything we can to find Merlin," he states. "It seems that there is an emptiness in these halls without anyone falling over every few seconds."

"Thank you My Lord."

Gaius nods and he turns to leave right as Sir Leon addresses Arthur.

"My Lord, I didn't mention this to the council, but our search for Merlin has uncovered some disturbing things," Leon states.

Gaius overhears and decides to stay to listen in.

"What did you see Sir Leon?" Arthur asks.

"Deep into the forest, we found . . . several dead bodies sire," Leon answers. "The intriguing fact is that in one of the villages we passed by, in our search for Merlin, has warned us about a group of dangerous and evil sorcerers."

"So you're saying that the dead bodies you found are the doing of the group of rogue sorcerers then," Arthur questions.

"No sire . . . the dead bodies we found match the description of the rogue sorcerers," Leon responds. "It seems that someone, or something with great magic killed them. We did not see any injury due to weapons such as swords or arrows sire."

"How many would you say killed the group of sorcerers?"

"From what we uncovered, it would only seem that 1 or 2 people defeated the group," Leon answers worriedly.

"How can one sorcerer defeat a group of sorcerers," Arthur asks out loud.

The idea of a very powerful sorcerer worries Arthur, but he doesn't allow his worry to be visible.

"Magic or no magic, it is good that we are rid of those dangerous sorcerers," Arthur says. "But now we have the problem of who killed them. Maybe it was Morgana?"

"I don't know sire," Leon answers. "The information that I heard from the villagers is that each sorcerer has powers that rival Morgana's. So I don't know how she could match a group of them. They also informed me that there is imminent danger coming, as if there are more where those sorcerers came from."

Arthur looks to Gaius for advice, "What do you think Gaius?"

"Well My Lord, there are mighty sorcerers out there that have sought revenge because of the Great Purge," Gaius responds. "It is only a matter of time before they group together to exact revenge. Having them combine power can be disastrous for Camelot. Nothing can stand in their way."

"Well what do you suggest we do if they decide to attack," Arthur asks angrily. "We shall defend Camelot with our swords and courage. Magic will never triumph here."

"Of course sire, I am sorry if you think I ever doubted you," Gaius respectfully answers. "But a sword can be limited by its reach. If what Leon says is true, then let us hope that we have enough power to defend ourselves."

"We will Gaius, for the sake of Camelot," Arthur answers.

Arthur faces Leon to speak, "Sir Leon, send out another search party for Merlin. Also, look into more information about any rogue sorcerers plotting against the kingdom. I would also like to find out about who killed that group."

"Yes sire," Leon responds.

The three men separate and walk away to their destinations. Arthur's thoughts are about Leon's story. He wonders who could've been strong enough to take down a group of skilled and dangerous sorcerers. He hopes that whoever it is, is not Camelot's enemy.

He tries to move his mind away from the information, and he settles on thinking of Merlin. He still has to find his manservant he thought. He arrives at his room and looks around. He realizes that Merlin's absence has led his room to be a complete mess. Arthur sighs as he asks a question out loud, "Where are you Merlin?"

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**Thanks for the reviews guys!  
Sorry I've been late on updates. Don't lose hope in me :)**

**Also, what do you guys think of my avatar? hehe. FF7 anyone?  
**


	5. Chapter 5 - Three Words

**Music Choice: Symphony 7, Allegretto, Movement 2 by Beethoven**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, but I own the soundtrack . . .**

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CHAPTER 5 - Three Words

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She is now awake in her bed. The pain in her leg is subsiding, and it appears that Merlin has tried to use magic to heal her. She looks down on her leg, "_For someone with strong magic, how can he be so bad with healing_?" She thinks to herself angrily, but deep inside she is impressed with Merlin's healing magic, it's just that it is not up to par to her own healing skills.

She fell asleep last night watching Merlin clean her hovel. They were mostly silent after her angry outburst, only occasional questions voided the silence. Questions mostly from Merlin asking whether she needs something or if it can be thrown out, but his questions were mostly met with monosyllabic words or even silence.

This morning, he is not in the hovel. She is glad that he is out at the moment so she can have a moment to herself to think.

"_He hid himself from me. Why didn't he tell me? We are the same after all, both of us have magic. But why did he distance himself from me?_"

Her thoughts continue and she feels her heart get heavy, "_He didn't trust me . . . he didn't trust me . . . does that mean that he never saw me as a friend? Did he even like me as a person?_"

She remembers the times that Gwen would tease her about her secret admirer. She always vehemently denied that Merlin could've had feelings for her, but for some reason, she enjoyed Gwen's teasing. She is reminded of the past with Merlin. The looks that she has caught him giving her. The talks they had. The adventures they had together. The jokes and the laughs. Those times are long gone, but she cannot deny that Merlin may have been fond of her.

Also, there is the kiss.

She hasn't thought about it since, actually, she has tried her hardest not to think about it since it happened. Unfortunately, her struggles have been in vain, she has recounted the event in her mind numerous times with the last time before she was taken by surprise by ill-willed sorcerers.

She remembers cleaning his wound while verbally assaulting him about some topic like loyalty or duty. In her mind, she knows how physically close she was to Merlin at that moment, but no malice was in her heart. She simply was cleaning his wound while staying innocent to any physical distance that is acceptable between a male and a female. Before the moment, she glanced at his unassuming blue eyes as they betrayed a hatched plan in his mind. His eyes quickly closed as his lips pressed into her.

It is the feeling she felt at that moment that implore her to continually replay the incident. The feeling that make her, almost . . . content, a feeling that she is complete. This scared her, which is probably why she pushed him away from her. She refuses to accept that she likes it, or even welcomes it, especially from her worst enemy. The man that has repeatedly thwarted her plans.

Even so, she couldn't stop herself from wondering what the kiss meant to Merlin. She wants to talk to him about it since they haven't discussed it. She is sure that with the Fomorroh's control on him, he will not be able to refuse to answer her. However, she is tempted to remove the Fomorroh herself to have him explain on his own accord.

The contents of her thoughts worry her as she decides that she has to send Merlin away before she does anything rash. Moreover, seeing his jolly and carefree attitude while she is constantly being tortured with her thoughts compounds the anger within her. "_This is unfair. While I constantly battle with my thoughts, this fool is living like nothing has happened_."

Her focus shifts back to Merlin's magic. Those few seconds that she saw him, she was in awe. The facade of a useless and weak servant boy was shattered at that point. In its place, a strong and noble sorcerer, no . . . a warlock, replaced him. The poise in which he easily took down several powerful sorcerers without a sweat showed to her how simple and how natural it was for him. She knows the extent of her own powers, and is very proud of her strength. She has enough confidence in herself that she could take on any magic user thrown at her . . . except maybe Emrys, and now, Merlin. _Merlin_? "_I wonder who would win in a battle between them_."

Magic is now a big part of her. Since her discovery and training in magic, she can't remember a time that she refused to use her magic. Merlin's decision to hide and not use such powerful magic is foreign to her. Or maybe, _he has been using it all this time_?

She thinks back to past events that involved Merlin. Camelot was under attack by sorcerers, both hidden and out in the open. For some reason, Merlin always knew something; he always knew the threat before everyone else did. Then all of a sudden, at the time when all hope is lost, the threat would just simply go away. She would always wonder how suddenly the threat passes. Even when mythical magical creatures attacked. Merlin was always there in the battlefield, of course Arthur would come back triumphant claiming the victory while berating Merlin on how good he is at hiding or laying on the ground, but Merlin always came out alive. "_Has he been using magic then?"_

"_But when I was the threat, why didn't he just kill me? He had a lot of chances to dispose of me, chances where we were alone and no one could've seen him. He could've killed me with ease. But why didn't he? Why didn't he kill me? Did he pity me? Did he look down on me? Was he hoping that I would just suddenly stop my noble purpose? Stop my goal of returning magic to Camelot?_"

Her breathing has become deeper, as her questions have become heavier. She remembers that she almost died several times in her life. Most of her time of near death, her saviors have been accounted for. There is Edwin who healed her from her internal hemorrhage, then Morgause from Merlin's poisoning. But there is still the unaccounted time of her head injury from falling down a flight stairs. She was very close to death and she just woke up uninjured. _"Was that Merlin?_"

The door to her hovel open quickly and there at the door is the warlock, the man that kissed her. She has to stop herself from referring to Merlin that way.

Merlin enters the hovel and directs his full attention at Morgana. He acknowledges her and begins to bow, but she interrupts him, "Where have you been?" Anger is obvious in her tone.

"Uhh . . . I'm sorry Morgana, I was just out picking . . ." he answers uncomfortably while Morgana cuts him off.

"Shut up and defend yourself!"

Morgana decides to let her anger out. She overlooks how unstable her emotions have become because he left her alone to her thoughts. She pushes herself up off her bed. She is able to force herself to stand even with Merlin's protests.

Morgana lifts her hands and begins throwing offensive spells at Merlin. Merlin follows her order and simply holds his palm up to absorb all her attacks. She is now becoming frantic as her eyes begin to water. Merlin sees her distress and begins moving forward towards Morgana. She continues her onslaught as tears are now falling; her attacks have no effect on him. Her legs are becoming weaker as her injury is taking its toll. Merlin keeps moving closer while keeping the barrier that protects him.

A few more steps and he is now directly in front of her. The futility of her efforts forces her to fall to her knees, sobbing uncontrollably. Merlin kneels in front of her and places his hand on her shoulder for comfort.

"Morga . . ."

"Why haven't you killed me?" she yells at him. "Why did you save my life before?"

Merlin remembers the time when he used Kilgharrah's magic to heal her, "I couldn't watch everyone's grief. . ."

"But here I am trying to kill you," she continues to yell. "I've been trying to kill you and all your friends. You could've ended all of this anytime you wanted."

"Morgana, you were my friend too," he answers. "It's never easy to bring oneself to kill a friend."

"But it was so easy for you to poison me?"

"It was the hardest decision of my life," he responds. "I couldn't even bring myself to look at you drink the poison . . . but I had to look at you, I needed to see your face for the last time. The look you gave me is something that I will never forget, a look that will haunt me for the rest of my life. I think this is why, at that moment, I wanted to save your life."

Morgana's eyes look at him in question.

"I told Morgause which poison I used, she needed it to save your life."

This revelation surprises her. Morgause's retelling of those events never included the fact that Merlin just revealed right now. She always chose to focus on how Merlin poisoned her.

"You gave her that information? Why would you do that?" she screams. "Answer me!"

"Because . . . " Merlin's becomes uneasy at the question, but he is forced to answer. "Because I cared about you Morgana. I may even have . . . _loved _you."

Morgana stops momentarily, breathing in his words. The heavy weight of his statement forcing more tears to fall.

"I could've killed you so many times. You could've ended all of your suffering," she looks at him.

Merlin's demeanor stays calm. The Fomorroh's control of him is keeping him obedient and it annoys her even more. She wants to hear his anger; she wants him to fight back.

To Morgana's frustration, Merlin answers her in a serene tone.

"I never wanted to take your life because I want you to see the Albion that I will create with Arthur," Merlin answers politely. "The Albion that welcomes magic. The Albion that welcomes people. . . like us . . ."

Her eyes open wide at his confession, "With Arthur? Magic?" She eyes him menacingly. "Arthur is no better than his father. He continues to condemn people like us. How can you support someone that would easily dispose you if he knew the truth?"

"I believe in him. It is our destiny."

"The only way magic will return is if I take my rightful place at the throne!"

"Morgana, it is Arthur's destiny to return magic to Albion. And it is my destiny to help him get there."

She wonders whether it is a good idea to have him return to Camelot now. Her hatred for Arthur is still substantial.

"You will return to Camelot!"

"Morgana," he stumbles. "Your injuries . . . and the forest . . . it's unsafe at the moment. I cannot leave you at this time."

"No, you will return to Camelot," she seethes. "And you will fulfill a task for me."

She pauses for a second before commanding him.

"You must kill Arthur Pendragon."

Merlin simply nods as he accepts her command. He stands up to leave. He disappears as quickly as he came in, leaving Morgana alone in her hovel.

Of all the words exchanged between them, words of anger and confessions, three words have been imprinted on her mind that she will not easily forget. Words that she never thought she would hear from him. Three words that could possibly change her perception of him. Three words that could bring her world crumbling down on her. _He loved me_ . . .

* * *

**Emrys mode!**

**R&R**

**Sorry for the late update! Also, check out my one shot "Her Last Memory!"  
**

**-FanFictionEngineer**


	6. Chapter 6 - Metamorphosis

**Music Choice: Falling Slowly by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova - beautiful song**

* * *

CHAPTER 6 - Metamorphosis

* * *

"You know what I like about Merlin? He never expects any praise. All these things he does just for the good of doing them"

King Arthur has been listening to Sir Gwaine ramble all throughout their patrol. He always dreads riding alone with Sir Gwaine, but he would be lying if he said he doesn't agree with the statements that Sir Gwaine has been making about Merlin. He finds relief when he notices movement in the woods, "_Finally! Something more interesting than Gwaine's mindless chatter_."

He holds out his arm for silence and dismounts his horse to approach the movement near the bushes. Both he and Gwaine draw out their swords, "Declare yourself."

Merlin struggles out of mud and steps out onto the path. He laughs when he sees Arthur and Gwaine.

"Merlin!" Arthur approaches him for a hug. "I thought we'd lost you! Haha!"

* * *

###

* * *

The past few days have been uneventful for Morgana. Merlin has left to fulfill his task at Camelot, and Morgana is once again alone in her hovel.

She has put all her faith in Merlin to complete his task as she temporarily halts all the scheming and planning against Camelot. However, this leaves her with virtually nothing to do, which is fine for her as she really has not been in the mood to do anything at all.

In fact, she is so content in her lazy, somber mood that she hasn't eaten since Merlin left. Tonight will be another night where she lets her hunger pass while she sleeps alone in her lonely hovel.

Having Merlin around gave her company, and someone to talk to. Not to mention someone she can treat as a human punching bag. She remembers how much of the pain and the anger she had subside whenever she went in an all out offensive attack on Merlin. It was a stress reliever.

At the moment though, she really just feels like talking to him. She tries to rationalize her feelings by adding that she could strangle him for a bit after they talk.

She admits that she may have been too hasty in making a decision to send him off, but having him dwell longer would've caused her more grief. Grief for not fully understanding his motives for his past decisions; grief for not knowing why he kissed her.

Morgana springs to her feet from her prone position in her bed as she hears a noise outside her hovel. She has been jumpy recently ever since she was attacked by rogue sorcerers. Additionally, the only person that journeys out to her hovel is her uncle Agravaine, who already came the night before to deliver news about Camelot and to discuss plans.

She readies herself to use her magic to attack. The trespasser knocks on her door opening it. A raven-haired man peeps inside the hovel, only allowing his head to enter. The man sees Morgana in the middle of the room and addresses her, "Hello Morgana!"

"Merlin!" she exclaims in relief. "What are you doing here? . . . is Arthur dead?"

Merlin opens the door fully to reveal a basket in his hand, there looks to be some food and other items in the basket.

"I'm sorry Morgana, I have not succeeded yet," he looks disappointedly at her. "I will try again tomorrow. I've gone through a lot of setbacks."

"Well, since you haven't fulfilled your task, why are you here?"

"I just wanted to return to make sure you are doing okay."

"Do you think that I am a child that I could not take care of myself?" she grumbles angrily.

"I do not, but . . . sometimes . . . maybe," he answers cheekily.

He enters the hovel and closes the door behind him. Morgana falls back onto one of her chairs as Merlin moves to place the basket onto her table.

"It looks like your leg is healing fine?"

"Mhmm"

"But you do not look well. Are you sick?"

"I may have missed a few meals," she answers with a disinterested tone.

"Lucky for you then, I have brought you a meal," he smiles at her. "As well as some other things."

"I'm not hungry."

"Morgana, you have to eat," Merlin places the food in front of her. "Here you go. Eat."

"Fine," she responds as she occupies herself with the plate before her. She notices Merlin shuffling with the other things in the basket, "What other trash have you brought with you now?"

"Well . . . what kind of servant would I be if I did not take care of my master's well-being?"

"What are you talking about," she asks while feeding herself a carrot.

"I have brought you some of your amenities," he answers. "I went back to your old chambers and brought back with me some items that you might like."

Morgana looks away from her food to raise an eyebrow at Merlin, "What amenities?"

"Well, I have brought you some of your cosmetic items, a mirror, your favorite green dress," he pauses to look at her at the mention of her green dress. "And a comb . . . "

"A comb?" her hands stroke her hair at the question. "What's wrong with my hair?"

"Yes . . . uhh . . . it's just that . . . you look like you haven't combed your hair since you left Camelot."

Merlin is lucky that Morgana has been lethargic lately, because her tiredness just saved him from being thrown against another wall. Instead, he receives a tomato to his face.

"I'm sorry, I'm just trying to look out for your well-being."

Morgana is fuming, "What need have I for such things? Put it away from my sight."

Merlin takes the basket and places it next to one of her shelves that contains several creatures, one of them being the Fomorroh.

"What possessed you to bring these things to me?"

Merlin turns back to sit on her bed while facing Morgana, "I just thought you might like some of your possessions back. Also, other than plotting the downfall of Camelot, you can spend some of your time with a hobby."

"A hobby?"

"Yes. Didn't you and Gwen use to comb each other's hair all day?" Merlin asks innocently, exposing how completely clueless he is about women.

"You know Merlin, if I didn't have any need for you, I would've killed you right on the spot for what you just said," she answers. But a small smile has crept onto her face. "You don't know anything about women do you? Is that why you just go off kissing women at random?"

Merlin shakes nervously at her question, "uhhmm . . . no . . . uhhh . . . I don't just go off kissing women. I've only kissed three women in my life."

Morgana almost chokes at his admission, "You've kissed _three_ women?"

"uhh . . . well yes. The first time was not of my own accord," he answers. "But the second and third time was because I wanted to."

Morgana studies the man before him. He is a simple man, not too good-looking, but not ugly either. He has a lovable quality about him that trumps any other man that she's met before, however, she can't quite point out what it is. _"He's kissed two other women before? Before me? Morgana, the king's ward that had men weak at the knees . . . was a third choice for someone like this simpleton?_"

"Who were they?" she asks with a tinge of jealousy.

"Well, there was Gwen . . ."

"Gwen!" she eyes him angrily. "That stupid little wench! You kissed her?"

"Actually . . . she kissed me," he explains. "It was when I died . . . or almost died."

"I knew she was trouble! I swear, if I ever see her . . . ugh . . . who else?"

"Well, then . . . there was Freya," his voice mellows at the mention of her name. Brokenness is clear in his tone.

"Who is this other loose woman?" she tries to ask bitterly, but pulls back after sensing his sadness.

"She was the druid girl that Halig captured," he answers. "The one who turns into a Bastet."

"Oh," she replies. "What happened with her?"

" . . . she's dead," he answers. "She was dealt a mortal blow when she was in her Bastet form."

"Let me guess . . . Arthur?"

Merlin nods back at her.

"See, Merlin, killing Arthur will not only benefit me, but it will help you get your revenge. He is not good for Camelot, and he has not been good to you."

Merlin looks down to the floor and stays silent.

"People like Arthur will never understand us. So we can never expect someone like him to lift the ban on magic. Unfortunately, Arthur is just as bad as his father, and nothing can change that."

Merlin doesn't move at her words.

"You and me, we have to stick together, we have to protect people who have magic. The only way to protect people like us and to lift the ban on magic is to kill the single person that stands in our way, and that is Arthur."

Morgana moves from her seat to sit next to Merlin on her bed, "You loved this Freya?"

He nods his head while looking down to the floor. She never imagined his response would affect her so deeply, but it did. Of course Merlin is perfectly free to love whichever woman he chooses, but she recalls the words that he imparted on her just a few days prior, that he may have loved her too. She is the only other woman that he chose to kiss on his own accord, "_that must mean something_," she thinks to herself. But the pain that Merlin is feeling somehow causes her to hurt for him.

Sitting side-by-side on her bed, she notices tears trickling down from his eyes. She can't herself but to place her arms around him to give him a hug. Merlin accepts the hug and moves his head between her head and her shoulder, in the process, pushing both of them to lay down on her bed.

They refuse to move as they both lay still, content in the warmth of their embrace. The contours of their bodies fitting each other perfectly and neither one wanting to ruin their comfortable arrangement. They allow themselves to consume moments in each others arms, before tiredness ultimately wins them over. They gradually drift into their dreams, satisfied in the cocoon that hey have constructed. What they will find in time, however, is that they cannot stay in this world they have built, that they eventually will need to break free. Break free from the ugliness that once plagued them, and break free to become something beautiful. For two lost souls, this is exactly what they needed. A metamorphosis.

* * *

**So, I should apologize. I haven't updated in a while. I've been having a hard time focusing lately. Both my fanfics ("Let Me Be The one" is the other) are suffering from my lack of inspiration. Sigh*  
**

**Hope you guys like this chapter though.  
**

**-FanFictionEngineer**


	7. Chapter 7 - Decisions

**Music Choice: My Stupid Mouth by John Mayer**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, but I was dressed up as a power ranger for Halloween . . .**

* * *

CHAPTER 7 - Decisions

* * *

Morgana had the best sleep of her life.

Her slumber was void of any nightmares and her bed has never been so _comfortable_.

She remembers the embrace that she allowed herself to be in; content in a position where she ended up falling asleep in the arms of a servant, _her_ servant to be exact.

Morgana's view of the world has been skewed by the tragic events in her life and the perspective she takes of those events. As a result, she has become cynical and hasn't had a meaningful and real relationship since her sister passed away. The relationships she builds with people are purely for selfish motives, created only to fulfill her needs.

So naturally, this _thing_, or whatever it is she has with Merlin is now entirely foreign to her. In her mind, Merlin is merely there to fulfill his duties for her. He is there to be her servant, an object to be used when needed.

At the moment, she enjoys using him as a pillow, but she is forced to open her eyes when she feels him tapping her shoulder.

"Morgana . . . Morgana . . ."

"What?!" she answers grumpily and proceeds to close her eyes again.

"I have to go back to Camelot," he answers. "I have to fulfill my task."

Morgana grumbles incoherently, "okay . . . a few more moments."

Merlin is lying back on the bed with his whole body facing the ceiling; his left arm is stretched out with Morgana's head resting on it. Morgana is lying sideways facing Merlin. Her left arm and leg are resting on top of Merlin's body which does not allow Merlin to leave the bed.

Several minutes pass and Merlin prods Morgana once more, "Morgana . . . I still have to ride out to Camelot. I need to be there early to avoid any suspicion."

"Fine!" she answers annoyingly while simultaneously kicking him off the bed. "Go leave then."

_Thud_. Merlin falls to the floor, "Ow . . . that hurt."

"Quit whining and just get out of here," her voice is still annoyed. She continues to lie in her bed.

Merlin collects himself from the floor and rubs his hip which took the brunt of the fall. "Okay then . . . so I'm off."

Merlin walks somberly to the door, stretching himself in the process. Before he could open the door to leave, Morgana addresses him in her prone position on the bed, "Merlin?"

"Yes Morgana?"

"I need you to come back tonight."

"Okay," he answers, and without a second thought, he is out of the hovel riding back to Camelot before the sun rises from the horizon. Of all the commands that the Fomorroh has forced him to obey, his master's last command is something that he is happy to follow.

* * *

###

* * *

Gwen and Gaius are already suspicious of Merlin. They both believe that Merlin is not of his own mind and is planning to kill the king. They race off to look for him in the castle before bumping into Sir Leon.

Gwen addresses Leon, "Have you seen Merlin?"

"He was in the armoury," Leon answers with a smile.

"What did he want there?"

He chuckles, "A crossbow. I think Arthur must be getting on his nerves."

"Why?"

Leon takes a moment to check their surroundings before whispering back, "He said he was going to kill him."

Leon bursts out laughing and walks away.

Gwen and Gaius finds Merlin in Arthur's chambers and Gwen promptly knocks Merlin out with a water pitcher. They bring him back to Gaius' chambers, where Gaius removes the Fomorroh on Merlin's neck. Gaius and Gwen eventually leave to attend to errands as Merlin lies down unconscious in Gaius' bed.

Merlin wakes up at a very late hour in the evening. He instinctively rubs the back of his neck and finds that the Fomorroh is not there anymore. He notices he is in Gaius' chambers and assumes that he must've removed the Fomorroh. He feels free. He has control again. He is no longer Morgana's servant.

However, it would not be true to assume that Merlin wasn't _himself_ when he was under the Fomorroh's control, he just couldn't make decisions on his own, especially decisions that go against Morgana's will. So every question she asked, he answered them all . . . _truthfully_.

He recalls the long conversations they had, the arguments, and the apologies. He was truthful in everything he said to her. His apologies were sincere. His confessions were true. Being truthful to her was beneficial to him too, in that it gave her an opportunity to be transparent. In the arguments they had, he fully saw the pain, the anger, the loneliness, and the betrayal she felt. It is then that his fears came true, when he came to the realization of how big a part he played in her transformation. Of course he understands that Uther played a bigger role, but he knows his decisions didn't help the situation. He saw all the bad emotions and feelings that he had caused her. His bad decisions pushed her away. He always did try to make decisions to pull her away from the path to evil, but all he really did was push her towards it.

His decision not to share his magic with her forced her to seek answers elsewhere. Sources that were not good for her, people that led her astray, bad influences that distorted her convictions. He believes that he should've been the one to guide her, the one who held her hand, the one who opened her eyes. But he didn't, he made a bad call.

Then there is her poisoning. He acknowledges that he should've told her the situation. He should've trusted her as his friend. To think that minutes prior to that event, she had called him "a _good_ friend." Those words always come back to haunt him, and now, he feels the error of his ways.

He misses her. He misses her a lot. He understands that he pushed her away, and presently, he wants her back. He wants the woman who called him a _good_ friend back. He wants the woman that he spent the last few days with to return. He believes that she has hope. He wants to believe that there is hope because he can't live with the thought of not kissing her again.

"_I kissed her. . . I kissed her . . _." he scratches his head. "_But she didn't kill me . . . also, I think I confessed that I may have loved her too!_"

Merlin stands up and starts pacing. The thought of the kiss makes him smile. He remembers how much he relished it, and now, how much he cherishes it. If he had to relive the situation he was in with her again, he would not change what he did, he would still choose to kiss her. He also ponders about his admission of love. It is true that he had very strong feelings for her before, "_but did I really love her? I know that I was obligated to give her a truthful answer . . . was that really what was in my heart?_"

He replays their last night together in his head. How Morgana tried to comfort him, "_comfort me with absurd reasoning"_ he thought to himself, and how she fell asleep in his arms. She looked so peaceful, so serene, "_if only she was like that all the time_."

He pictures her face when he woke up before her this morning. Her strong cheekbones accentuating her face and her pursed lips tempting him for a taste. The way she crinkled her nose when he decided to wake her up makes him want to be there to wake her up all the time. He longs for the closeness that they had. He loves the openness in their relationship, now that she knows about his magic.

He continues all his thoughts about her as he relocates himself to lay down on his own bed. He decides he shouldn't go to her hovel tonight since it is already very late. He allows himself to close his eyes but he doesn't stop his thoughts about her. He sees an image of her, her closed eyes that are facing him, her ebony hair spilling all over his arm as she crinkles her nose at him, moments before he falls to sleep.

* * *

###

* * *

"What is that? Arthur's socks?"

Merlin coughs at the smoking canister. He has just made another attempt at Arthur's life. Apparently, the Fomorroh that Gaius removed from him yesterday grew back and his will did not become his own once again.

Gwen has left already, leaving Gaius and Merlin to figure out how to completely remove the Fomorroh.

"There's only one way, I'm afraid," Gaius states. "You have to kill the mother beast."

"The creature that lives in Morgana's hut?" Merlin asks with a smile.

Gaius nods at him, "What are you smiling for? I think Gwen must've hit you in the head far too many times."

"No Gaius, I'm fine," he answers. "How long have I got? How long before this thing wakes up?"

"A day, no more. And I wouldn't face her alone."

"Don't worry Gaius, I have it all under control."

Merlin stands up to leave. He looks all too excited to journey to an enemy's lair. Gaius looks suspiciously at him, "You're going alone? Why don't you bring someone with you?"

But Merlin is already out the door even before Gaius could finish his sentence. He is thrilled to go see Morgana again.

* * *

**What?! FanFictionEngineer updated two days in a row?! What kind of sorcery is this?**

**Next chapter, we'll see how Morgana is doing. :D**

**Again, thank you so much for all the support and reviews. You guys are the best :D**


	8. Chapter 8 - Someone's Definition

**Music Choice: The Hill by Market Irglova**

* * *

CHAPTER 8 - Someone's Definition

* * *

. . ._**t****he previous morning . . .**_

Merlin has left for the day leaving Morgana to her solitude. She has a lot of energy this morning, most likely a result of the good sleep she had, or probably just because she now has something to look forward to.

But there is still a whole day before he comes back. She has been sitting on her chair, just finished eating breakfast, thinking of what to do until nighttime; until _he_ comes back. She realizes that for the past several years, her pastime only included plotting and scheming. Other than that, she hasn't indulged in a pastime . . . or a _hobby_ as Merlin put it.

She tries to imagine herself as the Morgana who lived in Camelot, the Morgana that was Uther's ward. She asks herself what is it that she enjoyed doing? What hobbies did she have?

Most of the time, Camelot was hosting different events: jousting matches, battle tournaments, entertaining nobles, holiday celebrations, and numerous feasts. All these events took up a majority of time each year. After one event ends, preparations for the next begins. So Morgana, being Uther's ward, attended and helped prepare all these events. On the day of each event, she would spend her whole day fixing herself up to be _displayed_.

"_What about when I had free time_?"

Now that she thinks about it, she recalls that her free time was mostly spent either with Gwen, _combing_ and fixing each other's hair (_"oh curse you Merlin"_), going to the market, practicing swordplay _in secret_, and reading. She always liked the days where she got to spend some time with friends, basically Gwen, Arthur, and Merlin. Usually, she didn't spend time alone with Merlin, they would only end up spending time together when he was with Gwen or with Arthur.

However, they became closer when she began having fears of magic. That night that she came to him about her fears, opened up a connection between them that she did not have with Gwen or with Arthur. After that night, they both had a reason to see each other without having Gwen or Arthur around, in fact, it seemed that Merlin took every chance he got to see her. She didn't mind it, or think anything of it because he was the only one she felt comfortable with her magic. He was there for her, trying to help her. She appreciated the care that he showed for her.

The dynamic of her friendship with Merlin was quite different from Gwen and Arthur's. With Gwen, she was basically forced to be her friend, forced to spend time with her since she was appointed to be her maid. Of course they became best friends, but being friends with each other was not a choice they made on their own. Similar to Arthur, they simply lived in the same castle, and grew up together. But with Merlin, he had no reason to make friends with her. He had no reason to care about her. Where other servants, knights, nobles, and commoners were uneasy around her because of her status and beauty, those things didn't bother Merlin. Circumstances didn't force them together. He chose to be her friend; and she chose him.

There were even times when they would catch each other in the library. Merlin likes to read too, a fact that she normally would find unusual for a servant, but it seemed fitting for a man like him. Usually he would be at the library before her, and he would get really secretive about things that he was reading. "_Hmm, was he reading about things that unmarried men shouldn't be reading?!_" she thinks to herself while her face forms an evil smirk.

"_But there was this one time that I was there before he was. I believe I was reading something about romance or family life,_" she remembers. She tries to recall the conversation they had in her head.

They talked about what their dream life would be. She went on to talk about her fairytale fantasy, with princes and castles and freedom with magic. It was a silly dream, but since it was her fantasy, she was allowed to be as extreme as she wanted. Then Merlin shared his dream. It was a simple dream, it didn't require riches or power. It was simply to have a happy and _free_ life.

"I just want to be content, I want to be happy, I want to live a free life," he explained solemnly, the weight of his words displayed the burden he was carrying.

"What is a happy life to you?" she remembers asking him. She thought that he was referring to freedom from being a servant, but now knowing it must be freedom with magic.

" . . . I want to live in a small cottage . . . by a lake. I want to be a farmer . . . where I could toil all day knowing that I'm not only working for myself, but working for my family, my wife . . . and maybe children . . ."

"Is your wife a princess?"

"She will be to me," he answered with a smile. "It doesn't matter to me what title she has: princess, noble, commoner, servant. I just want to marry the woman that is destined for me."

"What are you talking about?"

". . . I want to marry for love . . . I want to marry the woman that will make me happy, and a woman that is happy with me. I think you nobles are out of your mind by the way. People should marry for love, not convenience."

Morgana's eyes lit up at his words. It was times like these that she enjoyed talking with Merlin, because sometimes, he was the only one around her that had a realistic grasp of the world. And his words, she completely agreed with them, "You know Merlin . . . you're kind of brilliant sometimes."

"Oh milady, " he blushed. "Can you make sure to say that again when Arthur's around?" They both giggled.

"Merlin? . . . How do you know when you're in love," she asked him geniunely.

"Hmmm . . . I guess you'll know when everything that once mattered in your world didn't matter as much as _someone else_ . . . when everything you've built your whole life, your riches, your wealth, your comfortable life, your destiny, become unimportant that you would not take a second thought to leave it all just to be with that _someone else_ . . . when you're ready to throw away your life to save that _someone else_ . . . when you do anything you can just to please and take care of that _someone else_ . . .when you have your first kiss, the memory will never leave you and you would still find yourself reliving the kiss with that _someone else_, over and over again . . . when you're far apart, it wouldn't matter the distance, or even the danger, but you still do everything you can, just to be with that _someone else_.

Morgana was so in awe of his words that she had to ask herself, "_Have I been in love before? Have I ever had the urge to just leave everything behind, risk my life, and help someone I love_?" She then remembered the time she went to Ealdor to help Merlin, her action to put herself in danger to be there for him seemed to fit the definition. But she quickly disregarded it and thought it was simply a love for a friend, and not a love for a significant other.

Morgana snaps back to reality from her reminiscing.

Although the words they exchanged on that day carried a lot of weight, she hasn't thought about it since then. But she does know that she completely agreed with him and that she actually started to integrate it to her own definition of love.

She stands up from her chair and moves to the shelf that contained the jar with the Fomorroh. Just by looking at it, she develops a thought on her mind about Merlin, but she promptly dismisses it.

The basket that Merlin brought in is still there on the floor untouched, next to the shelf. She bends down to study the contents of the basket. She looks at the items that remind her of who she once was. She takes the comb out of the basket and runs it through her hair . . . which took a lot of effort.

She decides to take all the items from the basket, and she starts to use them. She is fixing herself up, she doesn't know exactly why, but unconsciously, the memory of her conversation with Merlin in the library is the motivation.

* * *

###

* * *

**. . . _the night before . . ._**

The day went by quickly. Having preoccupied herself with something to do made the time go by faster for her.

She actually had to hurry herself up a little since it is just about the time that Merlin should turn up. She also went out to hunt to prepare a meal for herself . . . and a second meal was also procured from her hunting which she tried to play off as a good hunting day and not something that she planned.

Her table is set up neatly for a meal for two people. She hasn't touch her food and tells herself that it's because she's not hungry yet and it's not because she is waiting for Merlin.

She sits quietly in her favorite seat with hands folded to her lap. She keeps her eyes fixed on an object on one of her shelves, the comb that she battled with all day. The other items that she used on herself are scattered around her comb.

She is wearing her green dress. The green dress that she wore often in Camelot. The green dress that she was mostly seen wearing in the castle walls. It still fit her, the soft material hugging the contours of her body, the gold accents perfectly placed to contrast her dress and her bright green eyes. She straightens some of the creases she can see on her dress as she continues to wait.

. . .

She is getting irritated and she wants to strangle him.

She has been waiting for hours, and Merlin hasn't turned up yet. She begins to worry, but she can't deny her first instinct to any unhappy situation, she gets angry.

Before she knows it, her anger has caused her to use her magic to throw her comb and other items around her hovel, both untouched plates and the contents of the table she neatly prepared are thrown to the floor.

Without a moment's hesitation, she stands up to move to her bed. She lies down to sleep, not even caring that she is still wearing her dress. She extinguishes all the candles in her hovel with magic, before drifting to sleep, sleeping the anger and loneliness she has, hoping that those feelings go away.

* * *

###

* * *

. . . _**this**_ **_morning_ **. . .

Merlin is riding as fast as he can. He doesn't really need to get to Morgana's hovel anytime soon since he still has a full day until the Fomorroh awakens. But his thoughts last night and the regret for not seeing her last night fuels his need to see her as soon as possible.

He knows that there are more knights stationed in the forest because of the recent string of deaths found in the forest, but Merlin throws away any attempts of stealth, because to him, _no matter the distance, or even the danger, he has to be with Morgana right now_.

It doesn't matter to him if he is found by the knights or even by any of the dangers that may be present in the forest, because similar to the time when he took down those rogue sorcerers for her, _he is ready to throw away his life to save her, to bring back the old Morgana_.

He has been haunted by the memory of the events in her hovel. The memory of their kiss, _the memory that never left him, the memory that he keeps reliving in his mind, over and over again_.

He is ready to do anything he can, just to _make sure that she is okay, that she is happy, that she is taken care of_.

He dismounts his horse and enters her hovel, she is not there. A part of the hovel is a mess, he gulps at the idea of how angry Morgana must've been for him not to show up last night.

He races to the untouched shelf and reaches for the jar with the Fomorroh. He opens the lid and throws it in the small fireplace that Morgana has in her hovel.

**Ontende þisne wyrm þæt he licgeþ unastyred a butan ende!**

The Fomorroh squeals and Merlin jerks back as he feels it die behind his neck. He replaces the lid back on the jar and returns it to the shelf. While doing so, he notices the basket he brought in days earlier . . . it's empty.

He then takes a closer look at the messy part of the hovel. He walks over to an area and recognizes the items that he brought back with him from Morgana's old chambers. The comb, the cosmetic items, they're all scattered . . . and they've been used.

It makes him wonder, "_did Morgana use these last night?"_

He looks towards the mess around the table, and sees food scattered on the floor. With them, he sees _two_ plates.

It doesn't take long before Merlin realizes what is going on.

"_Did she prepare a meal for us . . . was she expecting to have a nice evening with me?_ _Did she actually fix herself and comb her hair? _"

He then tries to look around for something green. He doesn't see it, he doesn't see the green dress he brought back with him.

"_Was she wearing the green dress? Did she really dress up for last night? Did she wear that for me?_"

His thoughts are interrupted as the door of her hovel opens, revealing her ethereal figure wrapped in the green dress that he has been so fond of. Her resplendent beauty dazzling him, causing his jaw to drop. Her long black hair flowing carelessly around her face, crashing with the wind like waves crashing on the beach. Her green eyes piercing into his. Her soft hands elegantly contrasting the color of the firewood she is carrying.

She drops the firewood at the sight of him, and crinkles her nose as she begins her tirade.

"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!"

Merlin ignores her yelling, actually, it is as if he couldn't hear her. At that moment, it seems like all his other senses fail to work, with his eyes the only functional one, as it is fixed on her eyes.

He begins to walk towards her. On his mind, his thoughts from last night and the realization of what Morgana did last night flood him.

. . ._ ~step~ ~step~ ~step~ . . ._

"I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO COME BACK LAST NIGHT!"

. . ._ ~step~ ~step~ ~step~ . . ._

"DO YOU NOT LISTEN TO ME ANYMORE?!"

. . ._ ~step~ ~step~ ~step~ . . ._

"ANSWER ME! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU LAST NIGHT?!"

. . ._ ~step~ ~step~ ~step~ . . ._

"MERLIN! . . . wait, what are you doing?"

She jumps a little when Merlin puts his hands on her waist. He grabs her and pulls her close to him. Their bodies now touch each other.

"Merlin. . . what do you think you're doing?" she asks as she looks up at him.

A million things are going through Merlin's mind. Thoughts that overcome him like an avalanche.

He looks deep into her eyes and comes to a realization about himself . . . he realizes that Morgana is not just anyone to him, but she is _someone_ to him.

_Someone_ that he could give up anything for, all the possessions he has accumulated, everything he has built, everything he has worked for, even his destiny.

She whispers to him with longing eyes, "Merlin . . .?"

"Morgana . . . I _love_ you."

He leans closer to her and he kisses her. The ground beneath them shakes as they consummate the kiss. Their lips delicately moving with each other. Their magic intertwining with each other.

Those few moments together, they are in their own world. It seems as if everything around them has vanished. That the only thing that matters to each other is the person in front of them. In that moment, Morgana has become the _someone_ in Merlin's definition of love.

* * *

**Three updates within four days?  
Someone please revive Uther, because clearly, SORCERY!**

**Just to let you all know, I LOVED writing this chapter! Hope you guys liked it.  
Also, I couldn't help myself but put in one of my favorite lines of Merlin. The one from the Changeling Episode (which is where I'm at time-wise with my other fic "Let Me Be the One") when he tells Arthur what he thought about him getting married to Elena.**

**I also made sure to keep Freya in mind on Merlin's definition of love because I decided that the conversation he had with Morgana in the library is post Freya and he needed to have some experience with love before he can have anything profound to say about it. hehe.**

**Which one of you crazy cats loved the hopeful Morgana waiting for Merlin to come back to their little hovel, but he didn't show up? muwahaha**

**Whew! This was a little long. hehe**

**Reviews will be very much appreciated :D**

**-FanFictionEngineer**


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